Are you ready to step confidently into your business sweet spot and attract the clients you truly want to serve? In this episode of Beyond Better, award-winning business coach and author Melita Campbell joins us to unpack how introversion can be a superpower in business, why mindset and self-leadership are critical for sustainable growth, and how systemizing operations reduces overwhelm while boosting predictability and impact.
We explore how identifying your unique value sweet spot—the intersection of your strengths and what your dream clients truly need—brings clarity that sets your brand apart, attracts ideal clients, and turns sales conversations into natural, confident exchanges. This is the heart of value-based marketing and sales strategy—a game-changing approach that not only boosts revenue but also preserves your energy, strengthens your confidence, and amplifies your overall impact.
If you’re an introvert looking for practical guidance to get started with marketing and sales strategies that feel confident and effective, this episode is for you.
Learn more about Melitta:
Book recommendations:
- A Shy Girl’s Guide to Networking, by Melitta Campbell
- The Go-Giver: A Little Story About a Powerful Business Idea, by Bob Burg
Follow me on:
- Instagram @stacyennis
- Facebook @stacyenniscreative
- YouTube @stacyennisauthor
To submit a question, email hello@stacyennis.com or visit stacyennis.com/contact and fill out the form on the page.
Claiming your author’s voice and building community | Episode 222 Transcript
Melitta: If we don’t really embrace this unique perspective we’ve been gifted, then we just blend in. So if you’re not acknowledging your strengths and you’re not really leaning into the lessons you’ve learned, you end up in the middle, which is bland and the same as everyone else. You just can’t do anything exceptional in that space. So you really need to embrace all of this. And that’s where your true value comes from. Understanding your. Your strengths, your weak, the lessons you’ve learned from your weaknesses, the everything that you want to really help people with layered on top of your skills, your experience, your. Your values, all of these kind of things, everything that makes you. So this is.
Melitta: It takes a bit of time to think through this, but once you really start to get that appreciation, then you want to see, well, how can I use that to have the most impact for my dream clients? So we want to give that value some focus. So in knowing your dream clients or your dream readers, your audience, we can start to find out everything that they’re going through and how can we have the biggest impact for them, what makes them ideal for us and what makes us perfect for them. And then finding that overlap is what I call your value sweet spot. And when you, this is where if you focus all of your actions, your plans, your processes, everything from this value sweet spot, you’re naturally differentiated, you’ll naturally stand out.
Melitta: And knowing this before you start writing a book is really powerful because then that book is going to be just driven from your perspective that no one else has.
Stacy: Welcome. Welcome. I am really excited about our topic for this week. We’ve never specifically talked about introversion or really that much about sales on this podcast. A little bit. So this week’s guest is going to be really special because we get to delve into an area that I haven’t really explored in detail before. So let me introduce you to this week’s guest. Melitta Campbell, better known as the Value Whisperer, is an award winning business coach, TEDx speaker and best selling author who helps introverted experts grow marketing and sales strategies designed for their strengths.
Stacy: Over three decades in marketing and communications, she discovered an uncommon truth that success isn’t about shouting louder, but resonating deeper. Featured in Forbes, Fast Company and Thrive Global, Melitta hosts the Art of Value Whispering and founded the Value Whispering Circle. Her new book, the Art of Value Whispering arrives this fall. Melitta, welcome.
Melitta: Thanks Stacy. It’s brilliant to be here with you today and I’m really excited to dive into this conversation. We were just talking off screen and we have so many angles to bring it back in. So yeah, I’m looking forward to this discussion.
Stacy: I am too. And when I learned about you, a lot of what I read and watched from you listened to really resonated because as a female in business, a lot of the education that’s out there around marketing and sales is very bro y. It’s like being very aggressive, being very loud and that’s never resonated with me. So I really like the way that you feel frame your work. So let’s start actually with your founding story, how you got to this being known as the Value Whisperer. Can you share a little bit about the story behind that phrase and what it means?
Melitta: Yeah, I’ll try and give you the short version as I’m quite old now. I’ve always worked and studied marketing and sales since I was 16 and through my whole career I’ve always done marketing a little bit differently and communication differently. And I really saw it as a way to add value and create connection and build relationships. And although that is for me what marketing is really about at its core, as you said, not many people are talking about that these days. It’s all about promotion and being loud and connecting the thousands of people and, you know, spamming them and whatever, being everywhere. But that’s not really practical for us as business owners.
Melitta: And although I’m more introverted and a lot of my clients are introverted as well, I think a big struggle for my, well, a struggle that I saw for many business owners is that even if you do have a marketing and sales background, even if you are the most outgoing person talking about yourself and your value and saying, hey, I’m brilliant, so still feels a bit weird, you know, so we want to do so in a way that feels really natural and creates that connection and relationships with. With other people. So when I started my business 17 years ago, I live abroad, I live in Switzerland, and I had a career, but when I had kids, I didn’t have a support network around me. And it was. It was just really difficult to find any childcare.
Melitta: So I had to start my own business or not do anything, which, you know, I love being a mom, but I wanted to do something with my expertise as well as, like, communications is something I’m really passionate about. So I started consulting for large companies. I was helping leaders to communicate with their teams, grow in confidence, create more connection and engagement, and help people around them understand their ideas. And it got to a point where, you know, it was bringing in a lot of money, but it wasn’t necessarily aligned to my purpose, and it didn’t really feel like the right thing for me to do anymore. So I started to look at how else can I use these skills? And that’s the moment where I do a lot of networking. That was my first book, A Shy Girl’s Guide to Networking.
Melitta: And I saw a lot of women around me. Not just that this doesn’t just affect women, but that was my network. That’s. That’s who I’m exposed to mostly. And they were. They started a business, a lot of coaches and consultants, for example, and they were amazing at what they did. I don’t think any woman starts her own business if she’s not really convinced in her heart she has some real value to bring to other people. The trouble is, then she didn’t know how to communicate her value, how to market and sell her services in a way that felt natural, didn’t cause her to burn out or feel inauthentic in any way. And so they weren’t getting clients. And because they weren’t getting clients, they were taking that as confirmation that they weren’t really cut out for this life after all. So.
Melitta: Which wasn’t the case. They just were trying to use the wrong strategies for their personality, their vision, their expertise. And it didn’t really reflect the way that they wanted to do business and the experience I create for their clients. So I repackaged my. My approach to marketing and communications. I’d. I’d tested over many years, and I had worked with several small business owners before that as well, which helped me realize that it’s not just about the marketing and sales. You have to have the mindset behind that. As well, because I could hand you the perfect marketing plan, and without the right mindset, you won’t do anything with that. So it had to combine all of these elements. And then I called it the dream clients blueprint because it was really focusing people on just working with their dream clients.
Melitta: But then over time, it was my clients that said, oh, you’re really. They started calling me a value whisperer. And I thought that was really interesting. So I kind of took that title. And as I was exploring what that really meant to me, I realized actually, I’m not necessarily the value whisperer, but I teach value whispering. Because once you understand your value, and if you weave that through your messaging, your marketing and your sales, you naturally stand out as the right choice for your ideal clients. You start to use strategies that lean into your strengths and things start to feel a lot more straightforward and you gain more flow more, and therefore better clients, more profit. Everything that we want to be sustainable and to have an impact that we feel proud of. So that’s. That’s really the story behind it.
Stacy: There’s so much. I mean, you just offered so much juiciness. I know we’ll dig in more detail, but maybe we could narrow in on the introversion piece for a moment. I can. So, a little side note. One of the very first books that I worked on when I started my business in 2009. I think I worked on this book in like 2010 or 2011 was on introversion. And this was before a lot of the, you know, popularity around understanding introversion, celebrating introversion. So it was really novel and interesting for me to learn about it and to work with this author who was introverted and really guiding people who are introverted. And his area was around leadership. And so I think many people now understand that when you think about introversion and extroversion, it’s really about where you get your energy from.
Stacy: And from that process, I learned that I’m an ambivert. So I can kind of naturally. How would I describe it? Like, as an ambivert, I draw my energy from single relationships, being alone, and also from groups. But I also need a lot of rest and restoration time when I’m in those, like, high energy, more outgoing places. And having that self awareness was really helpful for me because I always used to think I was an extrovert until I learned about this. And then I kind of had this awareness about myself. And it also has helped me manage my energy better, both personally and professionally and how I actually book My calendar and things like that. And I was interested when I got to know you because you talk about introversion as a.
Stacy: This kind of seed bed for these natural business and marketing skills, which was not in the context of what I learned about previously or really have studied. So I would love to hear a little bit more about that. Maybe you can also give your own definition of introversion so that people can self identify and, or kind of relate to what you’re saying and then talk a little bit about why introverts tend to have these special skills in sales and marketing.
Melitta: Yeah, great question. And yeah, you’re right. Introversion is all about how we, where we get our energy from and understanding what drains it. So it’s not just social situations, but anything that’s novel and new, we find that draining as well. So managing, knowing that we can manage our energy much better. But what I was always told, well, and I was very shy growing up as well. In most situations, in certain situations with certain people, you know, you would have thought I was an extrovert. But it was. Can be very situational and dependent on our skills as well. Our confidence in certain situations can impact. So extroverts can be shy. It’s not the same as introversion, but in my case it was yeah.
Melitta: So what happened for me growing up being shy is that I was always told, oh, you can’t do that, you can’t do this because you’re shy and introverted. And after a while I started to believe it. But then it came a point where I was like, well, hold on a minute. Like with networking, for example. I’d always believed that I couldn’t do that because I was shy. And until I realized, well, till I moved to Switzerland and realized if I don’t figure this out, I’m not going to have any friends, I’m not going to progress in my career. You know, things are really going to be dire. So which taught me that the if your vision and your goals and your reason for doing something is bigger than your obstacles, you can do it. So I pushed myself to really figure that out.
Melitta: And it showed me that actually I have some amazing skills when it comes to networking that the extroverts don’t have. So they may feel more confident walking into a room and just having multiple conversations with people and they don’t get drained by that. Because part of the problem when we get our energy drained. So we may go to in social situations and then feel our energy drained down and then we remember what that felt like and how we didn’t perform and then that gives us a, we kind of take that negative experience and overlay that for the next time. So I became aware of that. So I was trying to really create positive networking experiences that I could use to build that confidence and that comfort with being in a room.
Melitta: But then, and I, for a long time I was trying to network like an extrovert. But then I realized this just isn’t ever going to work for me. I shadowed this lady who would literally she would have like three conversations at the same time. I was like, I, I can’t do that. I have to find my way. But then I was thinking, well, what can I bring to a networking conversation? I can’t bring the energy and you know, all of this, but I’m sure there’s something. And I realized that what people around me really valued was that I would take time and listen. And they were always amazed at how much I could feed back to them that they hadn’t realized for themselves.
Melitta: So, and this is the skill that we need in networking to help people feel seen and valued when we listen and can reflect back and ask some great questions. And it’s also what we need for sales, right? If we have a sales conversation done well, it’s we feel seen, heard, understood that the other person gave us space, that they asked great questions, they started to understand our situation before reflecting on that and giving us a clear suggestion. So introverts actually have amazing skills that in that respect. Plus when we have a system we can follow, we’ll follow it. We know that this is the structure, whereas extroverts can go in and they’ll just wing it. So they can have unpredictable results as a result. So, you know, a lot of our strengths are make us amazing at networking, amazing at sales.
Melitta: And because we start to really understand our audience, we can do something very special with our marketing as well. It doesn’t need to be the same way as everyone else is doing it, but to reflect the relationship we are building with our clients. And I had one client that describes the way she felt about this methodology of finding her path to marketing is side door marketing. Now I don’t know if that works for people outside the uk, but in the UK you have your front door and then you have a side door which is often left unlocked and that’s where your friends and family just walk in. So she’s like, oh. While everyone else is like knocking on the door and politely introducing themselves. I feel like I’m going straight in the side door saying, cooey, shall I put the kettle on?
Melitta: Because you’re already part of your client’s world. You’re already adding value. You already, you’ve already built that relationship. They know like and trust you, and they’re starting to believe you could be the right person to work with them. So when they come to that sales conversation, it’s a really nice conversation. That’s an extension of the relationship you’ve already built. It’s not suddenly a big switch and now, oh, I have to figure out, how do I now sell to them? You, you know, it’s just that extension and an invitation to join the next step. So it all feels like it flows together. So I think our ability to just take things that bit slower, to reflect, to really think, to show our thoughtfulness, which people don’t get enough of that these days.
Melitta: So I think it feels more of a collaboration with our clients as well. And if your clients are women love being part of the sales process. They don’t like being sold to at all. I’ve noticed when I had a business where I was working with a lot of men, and they would. I would just say, well, this is what you need, like, great, you know, and it was that easy. Whereas women like to, like, try things and have a conversation, and what if, you know, that’s part of the shopping experience? So having that conversation makes it part. More of an experience that. That they can enjoy and feel part of as well.
Melitta: So, yeah, I think we have a lot of skills that we just underestimate or haven’t noticed for ourselves because we’ve been telling ourselves that we can’t do all of these things when a hundred percent we can.
Stacy: I’m sure that was very validating for somebody listening to this or watching it on YouTube to, you know, be able to go, hey, I have. That’s me. I can 100% do those. Then from this point of awareness, the next step is moving into those networking and selling conversations. And earlier, in that wonderful introduction you gave, you talked about this hesitation to talk yourself up. Right. Which is so normal. It’s normal for women and men. But I certainly. I’m sure that data backs up the fact that women have a much harder time really using. Using those statements. I’ve seen it over and over again over the years. I have been that person. I’m sure I will be again. But that is really tough. It’s really tough to go into a conversation and really show up with that assuredness and the language to really sell yourself.
Stacy: What is your advice to people who are trying to become more confident in this area? And obviously, we’d never want to do this in a pushy, sleazy, slimy way, but I’m thinking about my authors that I work with, wonderful authors who are so amazing, experts, storytellers. They’re moving into this new space where they’re building a personal brand or launching a business, selling their book. And now they really have to show up in a totally new way because talk about their work, their book, their services, and do it in a way that attracts people and makes them want to come and work with them. How can people do this in a way that feels good and works?
Melitta: Yeah, amazing question. So the value whispering blueprint system has three parts. The first part is understanding your true value. The second part is weaving that value through everything that you do so you naturally stand out without being loud or pushy. And the third part is the self leadership, which is the mindset, the habits, the productivity, that kind of thing. But this first step, the true value, you know, it’s really hard to communicate your value if you don’t know what that is. And a lot of people, we do these exercises to find your value. And I’m saying values without the s, because your values is part of your value, but it’s not the whole thing. And here’s the challenge, especially for women, in finding your value is that one way or another, over.
Melitta: Over time, we’ve been taught that, you know, you don’t talk about your successes, you don’t talk about your strengths and what makes you brilliant, because that’s bragging. It’s being fully of yourself, and that’s a bad thing. And especially in groups of women where, you know, if you’re in the playground, you’ll see men, boys playing, and they’ll. They’ll get really excited and follow the strongest player. If you’re in a playground with girls and some a girl keeps winning at a particular game, they’ll change the game because we want it to be fair. So as women, we want to be fair, we don’t want to stand out. And that’s been. That’s part of our DNA anyway. But it’s also been really instilled in us as well that we don’t stand out.
Melitta: But the trouble is, if you’re not clear about what those strengths are, you can’t lean into them. You can’t. We’re not talking about bragging about these strengths, but building a business that uses those so that we can perform at our best and feel our most confident, because part of confidence is trusting in your ability to do things. So once we build a complete business model around what we do best and where we feel most confident and strongest and can have the most impact, then that’s always going to be a good thing. So first is to really be clear for yourself about what are those strengths and to really appreciate what you have and how you can use those. You’re going to bring more of those into your work already.
Melitta: The other thing, and authors may have explored this already, but the other area where we have value that is untapped or unappreciated is in our missteps, our mistakes, our failures, everything that’s gone wrong. And again, we’re taught not to talk about this because, you know, certainly in corporates, if you talk about your failures, then you don’t get your bonus, right? So we’ve been taught, again, don’t talk about this area because it shows weakness. It shows you’re not good enough. And so we kind of brush that aside. But this is where our value really comes from. This is where we’ve gained our perspective, our passion, our drive for helping other people. Because we’ve figured, we’ve been there, we’ve figured this out, we’ve got a better way. And if we don’t really embrace this unique perspective we’ve been gifted, then we just blend in.
Melitta: So if you’re not acknowledging your strengths and you’re not really leaning into the lessons you’ve learned, you end up in the middle, which is bland and the same as everyone else. You just can’t do anything exceptional in that space. So you really need to embrace all of this. And that’s where your true value comes from. Understanding your strengths, your weak, the lessons you’ve learned from your weaknesses, the everything that you want to really help people with. Layered on top of your skills, your experience, your values, all of these kind of things, everything that makes you. So this is, it takes a bit of time to think through this, but once you really start to get that appreciation, then you want to see, well, how can I use that have the most impact for my dream clients?
Melitta: So we want to give that, that value some focus. So in knowing your dream clients or your dream readers, your audience, we can start to find out everything that they’re going through and how can we have the biggest impact for them, what makes them ideal for us and what makes us perfect for them. And then finding that overlap is what I call your value. Sweet spot and when you, this is where if you focus all of your actions, your, your plans, your processes, everything from this value sweet spot, you’re naturally differentiated, you’ll naturally stand out. And this, knowing this before you start writing a book is really powerful because then that book is going to be just driven from your perspective that no one else has. So it released, it helps you to stand out.
Melitta: But it’s the same thing you’ll need for your messaging, your marketing, your sales process, and just honing in on that space. But that’s also the key to managing your energy because you’re just doing things that fall within your strengths, that fall within your experience, that you know have an impact for your clients. And once clients start to pay you for this expertise, then you start to build more confidence that you’re in the right space, doing the right thing and having that impact. And I think it’s this idea of having a contribution, particularly for women, is a key indicator of our personal success as well. So knowing that if you know this value sweet spot, do everything from that space, you’re going to make a unique and powerful contribution, then, yeah, that’s really the foundation of everything.
Melitta: So that’s really the start point is to find that sweet spot.
Stacy: I like that you start with really understanding your value. I think that’s huge. And really, truly anchoring in that and really believing it. Although certainly you continually hit up against phases where you have to kind of rework that and remind yourself and re. Anchor to it. I would love to hear an example. I’m. I like to try to get very, I like to talk high level, but I also like to get really practical on this podcast so that people can have some things that maybe they could go try or implement. Would you be able to give an example of somebody who was able to implement this, this process into their business and what the results were for them?
Melitta: So I’ll give the example of Sarah because she struggled with her sales conversations and I think her experience is very typical. So what she was doing was having these conversations with her clients and she dreaded them. The reason she was dreading them was because she’d have brilliant conversations with brilliant people who she knew she could help. But at the end, the person either was driving down the price, really demanding big discounts, or they would take the tiniest package possible or they would say no. No one was really saying yes to the bigger packages where she could really make a difference for them. And part of the reason was, and this is something That I see as a challenge for many experts, which I know your audience is full of, particularly, you know, coaches who have taken so many different certifications and.
Melitta: Or you get to a point in life when, particularly if you started a business, you have so much that you can give people. And she was telling people about everything that she could do to help them. And then they were just so overwhelmed. They were, like, confused. And a confused mind doesn’t buy or buy into anything. So that’s why they were driving down the price, because for them, moving forward was quite a risk because they didn’t really get it. They were like, okay, well, she’s really enthusiastic, so there must be something she can do to help. But I’m not quite seeing that value yet. So to make it safe for me to take that next step, I’ll just do this tiny bit or I’ll ask for a big discount. So, you know, if it doesn’t work out, it’s. I can.
Melitta: I can live with it. You know, this is what’s going on in the prospect’s mind. However, once she understood her value and she understood how to have a sales conversation, you’re really having a conversation first to understand the other person. What were they really looking for? What were they struggling with? What was their problem that they. The problem they most wanted a solution for? Because we always have lots of problems. And how could she best solve that problem? Then she was able to have that conversation and tell them, well, this is where I believe I can add the most value for you. This is what it would look like. This is my recommendation. And suddenly people were buying everything she had to offer, not asking for any discounts.
Melitta: And she was actually able, in a matter of, like, I think two months from having joyful sales. Sales conversations, two months later, she was actually putting her prices up significantly because she had the demand and people could really see that value. And she. She was consistently getting the yeses. And so it wasn’t that she didn’t have the value in the first place. It was that she wasn’t communicating it in a way that the other people could see because she just drowned it. You know, there was too much around it. So by having a proper sales conversation, listening, asking questions, just checking in with them, then she was able to then say, well, this is how I can make the most difference. So we need to remember that we are the experts.
Melitta: Our clients don’t know how to solve their problem or how to work best with us, because otherwise we wouldn’t be having the conversation. So it can take a Bit of courage at first to say, well, I just help you with this bit. But, you know, if we do that, it makes such a difference to our business and to the way we can help our clients. They get more of our. Our expertise and impact as well. So. And again, it all starts with that value sweet spot. Know that. And then you can really be more pointed in that conversation you’re going to have with your clients and get more sales.
Stacy: Yeah, it’s. It’s interesting because that got me thinking about something I didn’t realize I was doing. When I would talk with potential authors that, you know, authors that I might get to work with that I was. I’m not like, I’m a direct person. I’m kind, but I’m direct. And so, you know, I would sometimes get on these calls with authors that were thinking about working with me, and there would be points that I would disagree with them. Not, you know, it was never rude. It was always very professional. But I would push back or I would offer an alternative opinion or ask a clarifying question.
Stacy: Like I would use that space in my expertise that I knew I was bringing to help them through challenging them or validating them or encourage whatever it was that I could see in that moment as an expert that I needed to do for them. And it wasn’t until probably years of doing this that I realized that this is something that I was doing in these calls that probably most people would think was a bad idea when you’re meeting with a potential client to disagree with them or push back. But it always came from a place of wanting to serve them well. And whether or not we work together, at least I could support them in the areas on this call with something that will help them and serve them long term.
Stacy: And I also took from that as I. I’ve been actually reflecting on this recently in my own process and how I meet with people and how I can serve people well. Every layer of. From the moment we meet until the time we’re done working together with this continued relationship, hopefully forever. And I think that ultimately when you’re meeting with a potential client and you do have this expertise coming in, they want you to take over. You know, they want to feel like this person knows her stuff and she is confident and she gets it. And I’m going to be able to follow with this guide. But that is a little counterintuitive, I think, for. Especially we’ve been talking about women, a lot of people.
Stacy: It’s not how we’ve been conditioned for Most of our lives has not been to step to the front and lead everybody and, you know, take charge. I mean, that’s just not our societal conditioning. So I imagine that this is a, a big point of awareness for people. I’m curious if you agree with me on this because maybe you have a different perspective, but this has just been something I’ve been kind of dissecting this myself recently in how I engage with people. It’s something that I’ve noticed that I do.
Melitta: Yeah, I think when we take that expert positioning and say, do you know what? This is what we’re going to do. One, it’s you have a better chance to manage your business in a way that’s right for you because you’re not just doing something different for every client. You have a system. You have a way that you deliver results so your results become more predictable. You can run your business in a more predictable, systemized way. And you know that they’re going to get the results because if they do these things, they’re going to get this result because you’ve proven it time and time again, which makes it an easier sell because people are buying into a proven system. But then for them, you can see them relax, like, oh, phew.
Melitta: I had another, I had another client and she was a freelance writer, but she was always just responding to her clients and they were always sending last minute requests. And so she was drained. She had no time for her family, you know, it just wasn’t working. But as soon as she went through this process and she went back to her clients, you know, this is how we’re going to work from here on in. This is how I can get the best results for you. And she was really dreading that conversation. But they all said, yes. They all said, oh my gosh, this is exactly what we always wanted because they don’t know what they’re doing. So for her to guide that process and say, right now you have to do this, now you’re sending that, great, now I’m going to do all of this.
Melitta: And you, whatever, it was just a big relief for them. And all her clients, apart from the one that she was trying to get rid of anyway, all re signed up for the contract and all were happy for her increased fees. And then when she put this process in place, she took a family holiday for the first time for two weeks with no client work, no guilt, you know, it was all starting to work. She could manage her time and just had, then she had more time as well, to launch an online program. So she had diversified income streams, she became a professor. She was able to go out and speak more, which brought her more clients. So, you know, it all worked beautifully. Once she had that control and that whole process took her. I think we worked together for four months.
Melitta: After that came the sales and everything as well. You know, it’s not a lot of time to. Just because you have everything. Most of my clients are very smart. They’ve. They have a business that’s up and running. It’s just not working in a way that’s giving them the time, energy, and income and impact that they want. But it’s just small tweaks. It’s taking what they already know and then taking that step back and saying, right, if I was the expert, which I am, how do I get the best results for my clients? And then building a business around that and then weaving their value through that, bringing it all together, it happens very quickly once you have that kind of process working for you.
Stacy: Our listeners could not see me. Silent clapping our YouTube viewers could see me while you were talking about your client taking a vacation, because that is such an important piece. You’re from the uk, I’m from the US I think we share. I think maybe we’re a little bit more intense than y’ all in the hustle culture, but we both share this kind of societal valuing of depletion and not of restoration. And so to be able to free up that time, not just to take time away. And I’m recording this with you after just taking several weeks off with my own family, but also to have space to be able to create. I think that’s so important. You have mentioned in the past of your idea of success being based on self care, self compassion, and self respect.
Stacy: I’d love for you to talk a little bit about this, because we’re talking about sales, marketing, and business, which often we think about as being like, drive that sale. Keep working. You know, get your butt in the chair, do the work. But the way that you describe it with your clients, and I know your perspective on success has a very different angle to it. So can you talk a little bit about that?
Melitta: Yeah. I so love this question, because I don’t know about you, but I’ve definitely fallen into that trap of trying to do everything and feeling like I should do everything. I can do it, therefore I should. And multitasking. We’re always taught women can multitask, and we can in certain ways, but we have to be mindful of our Energy. There’s only so much we can bring to our business and our business is only healthy and successful if we’re healthy and successful. So it’s so important to put boundaries around our time and what we want. And the longer I do this, the more business owners I work with and speak with as well, the more I realize that the true route to success comes from self love, self compassion, self respect.
Melitta: Because is only when we have these things that we put those boundaries in place that we say no, I’m not going to work after 6 o’ clock and say no to the things that don’t take us towards our goals but are just a distraction. And there is just so many distractions for us, particularly as women and as moms and as people living abroad who have to figure out so many different things on top of it. There’s always so many demands. But if we can really center in on well this is my sweet spot. This is where I can add the most value, feel the most confident, do something that’s really special and magical for me and my clients. Then it becomes easier to say no to the things that fall outside of that, knowing that it’s going to prevent us from working.
Melitta: So if we say yes to things that fall outside of that value sweet spot that don’t take us towards our goals, then we’re saying no to ourselves and our priorities. So it’s really key to do that. And one thing that I’ve done because in my first business I was just giving everything to my clients, everything to my family and leaving nothing for myself. So which is partly why I realized I’m working with the wrong clients here was so I became really face to face with a burnout if I’m honest. And I knew it was coming as well. I just didn’t dare to think that I could do differently because I didn’t necessarily have enough of that self love and compassion. So I was thinking I don’t have the right to choose. I have to show up for these people. They’re relying on me.
Melitta: That’s my duty if you like. But as soon as I, I actually worked with a coach who helped me see like did that wheel of life and there was like me was pretty much one, you know, is it was like a, a slice of cake that someone had taken a big chunk out of and it really highlighted wow, I really need to make some changes here. And the first big change I made was I just reached out and asked people for help. So I can’t do all of this. Could you Think you could do this? And the first person I asked was my husband. Like, I need to do some exercise or have some time for myself. Do you think you could come home, like at 5 o’ clock at least once a week? Which wasn’t unreasonable. That was his working hours anyway.
Melitta: And he was like, yeah, of course. I was like, why didn’t I just ask before? And then I started asking bits and pieces from people and everyone always said yes. I mean, people love to help other people. If you think about how we feel when someone asks us for help or advice, we’re always happy to support the people we love and our friends around us. So it started to show me that I can ask for help. It’s not a weakness. It allowed me to be strong. It allowed me to do more of what was fulfilling and was having an impact. And bit by bit, I’ve become bolder in those boundaries. And it’s amazing. It is really great.
Melitta: And there are times when I allow them to dip because there is something, like with writing my book, for example, you know, there are moments where I just have to put in a bit more time and effort, maybe at the weekend or in the evening to get a particular part done. But I know it’s. It’s not ongoing, you know, it’s. It’s. And it’s intentional, you know, this is something that I really want. So. So I’m going to allow myself to do this. And I’ve put on my to do list now. So I’ve got a very different to do list I had before, because our to do list tends to be like, really long. And it’s just this constant reminder of everything we haven’t done yet. So now I’ve got my to do list in the grid system. So I have my to do list.
Melitta: And it’s just one or two things per day. And those are the things that I have to get done. And if I do that, you know, then I can choose, do I do some more, do I take the rest of the day off, do I do some personal development? Or, you know, I have a choice of what to do knowing that I’ve done the important things. The other thing I’ve done is put in there a section and it’s got three parts to it. It’s called mind, body and soul. So it reminds me that every day I need to do something to nourish my mind because I love learning. So it’s. Even if it’s just reading one or two pages of a book or listening to a podcast, like this one, something that’s going to nourish that side of me, help with my personal development.
Melitta: Then the body part is making sure I get enough sleep that I stay hydrated. I’m eating healthily, getting some exercise, and it helps to just have that. I know we need to do this anyway, but we often push it to the bottom or forget. So it’s right in the middle of my to do list, reminding me to do this. And I have to check at least something off every day, but just being a bit more mindful of it helps. And the final one is soul. And soul is just anything for you that is going to make you feel good, make you smile or laugh. So, you know, that could, you know, if that is watching Netflix or playing Candy Crush, then great. You know, if that really nourishes your soul, fine.
Melitta: Or maybe it’s going for a walk, meeting with friends, but being intentional about doing something that you really enjoy every single day, even if it’s just for five minutes. And sometimes it could be like reading a book could fill both. Both things. Who knows? But it just makes sure that I’m more balanced and I’m intentional about that. And I do not let that slip off my to do list each day because it’s right there in my face.
Stacy: I love that. I think it’s so important to be really intentional about our time and our energy and how we’re nourishing all parts of ourselves. I’ll ask you the last question I ask all of our guests, and that is if you can recommend one book to listeners, this is one that has profoundly impacted your life. What would it be?
Melitta: This is so hard to choose, as you can see. And you’re only seeing a small fraction of my bookshelf like I’ve got. I love reading. Well, of course, I have to say my first book, A Shy Girl’s Guide to Networking, because it really was the journey that I went on. And it helped me write something, come up with a structure and deliver it, and put myself out there. You know, it gave me so much more than just like writing a book to make sales. It was. It was really transformational for me and it has been for the people that read it. So I have to slip that one in there. But if I was to make a recommendation outside of that, I think I recently interviewed him on my podcast and I was delighted. Was a book by Bob Berg called the Go Giver.
Melitta: And it’s all about. It really dovetails in with this idea of value of Spring, because it’s all about how do we give value first to build relationships to as a foundation of everything we do. But it’s not about being a dormer at all. It’s really having boundaries around that. But looking at, well, how can we give more? How can we collaborate in a more open way? And it’s written as a fable. It’s just, it’s a small read, but it’s such a joy to read. And it’s been it’s one of those books I’ve read on a most on a regular basis as well. So there’s so many I could recommend, but I’ll go with that one.
Stacy: That’s great. Thank you so much for that recommendation. And where can our listeners find you online, follow you, learn more about your work?
Melitta: So if you go to melittacampbell.com you will find everything and there’s a little playbook in there where you can start the process of value whispering if that’s something that’s resonated with you. And on social media, I hang out mostly on LinkedIn and there I’ve been on there so long I’m just at.
Stacy: Melitta, Wow, that’s pretty good that you snagged that so early. Melitta, thank you so much for this conversation and sharing your wisdom with us. I really appreciate it.
Melitta: Oh, thanks so much, Stacy. I really enjoyed this and I love your show. So it’s a great honor to be here as well.
Stacy: Thank you so much. And thank you to you, our listener and viewers, for being here with us for listening. I truly hope this was transformative, impactful in some way and that there’s something you can go implement right away. And thank you as always to Rita Domingues for her production of this podcast. As I tell you every week, she is the only reason you are listening to this. Otherwise it would just get recorded and sit forever. She edits, she publishes, she helps share. It truly is the reason that this podcast exists. And since you’re still listening, you must really love this episode. If you could take a moment to rate and review the podcast, make sure you’re following me on your platform of choice, I would really appreciate it.
Stacy: It will help me reach more listeners with the message of living a life that’s not just better, but beyond better. And then you won’t miss great episodes like this one. Thanks so much for your time today and I will be back with you before you know it.
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